It’s Time For Change: A Letter To My Love.

Time has been harder than ever with my partner and we’re at a crossroads — do we leave the country together, or not? This letter and story is for you Gunz.

Michelle Love

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Today it hit me, again…as I continued to pack up my boxes to move to storage, I took a break to look for some rental properties in Mexico and Costa Rica…the price for a 3-bedroom, gorgeous home on the ocean is half the price of a shitty one bedroom in Vancouver, BC — where I’m from. I texted you — “WHY DO WE LIVE HERE?” While sending links to cheap properties in paradise.

You responded, “Because we love the suffering”.

I thought about this for a while. I am suffering, but of course, I don’t love suffering…it’s that I have been fearful to leave the matrix here, it had me sucked in. I have felt fearful of losing the business I’ve built, the friends I’ve made, the comfort I’ve known.

But, I’m not afraid anymore. I’m ready.

I then thought about you, which drives you nuts, I know…but I can’t help it. You’re really struggling lately and I love you. I know you are 42 and not where you want to be. Ever since the pandemic started, the shit really hit the fan for you, it was one thing after another. You were strong for a long time — but it got to the point where it all just wore you down.

I try every day to talk to you, to help you. I know you need to process this alone, but I want you to know that I am always here.

I love you dearly, and I do know you — and I know you feel misunderstood.

This breaks my heart because I have seen you at your best, I’ve seen what lights you up — but that has been lost. We have dreamt of leaving this country together for years, starting a farm (getting a donkey), and enjoying the sunshine, but we keep putting it off for one more thing….perhaps this story will reach you, and inspire love in your heart.

In the solitude and distance we’ve had from each other, where echoes of dreams meet the constant challenges of reality, there exists a story — a story of resilience, support, and the unwavering belief in the visions of the future that we shared in the early days.

Meet Gunz, a man who once danced in the spotlight of financial success, confidence, and popularity. As the winds of change blew…

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Michelle Love

My public journal about all the things I’ve been through & I’m interested in—with the hope that it benefits you. 🤍 Love is the answer