The Real Solution To Narcissism — Help The Narcissist.

Michelle Love
6 min readNov 11, 2022

Apparently, at the root of narcissism is insecurity- so can’t we solve this by helping them feel secure?

I’ve written a few articles on narcissism after going down a rabbit hole of research when not just one, but two of my boyfriend's exes warned me about him being a narcissist.

I’ll be honest – at the time, I didn’t really know what it meant to be a narcissist. I figured it was a casual term for someone who was self-obsessed and cocky– but as I researched I learned that it was so much more than that.

I became increasingly afraid.

This man I was with checked all the boxes.

Was I trapped? Was he going to hurt me? Was I ever going to be the same person ever again?

Being the empathetic person that I am — like many others who are in relationships with narcissistic people — I felt stuck. I felt there was no way I could leave this person. I wanted to help, I felt so bad for him and felt horrible guilt when I stuck up for myself.

Then, when I finally worked through the guilt with my therapist, I started to consistently stick up for myself and set boundaries I got even more scared…

Wait — Was I the narcissist?

It took me over a year of deep diving, counseling, witnessing patterns, testing alternatives, and listening to other people's relationships with said “narcissists” to come to the conclusion that, we’re really overreacting and obsessing about all this trendy narcissist stuff.

Before you jump to the comments section and cancel me for saying that, hear me out…

Everyone has some narcissistic traits and it’s up to us to choose how we respond to the narcissistic actions and behaviors of others. It’s up to us to decide how we think and feel about ourselves — and I deeply believe that it’s up to us compassionate, self-aware, empaths to lead by example.

People with narcissistic traits are calling out for attention. The attention they needed, but did not get at some point in their early lives.

People with narcissistic personality disorder are literally trapped and unaware that they are being suffocated by their own deep seeded patterns.

I’d be willing to bet that every…

Michelle Love

My public journal about all the things I’ve been through & I’m interested in—with the hope that it benefits you. 🤍 Love is the answer